Dear...

Look, I was not following you. You were safe behind the locked doors of your little Civic anyway, and I was vulnerable on my bike; you saw me there in the parking lot of the 99 cent store, waiting at the end of the row to make a right turn so that I could get out of the parking lot. You hunkered down, pretended I wasn't there, and wouldn't let me in the line of cars, but that's all right because the guy behind you did.

But I noticed as I was behind you, that you kept looking in your rearview mirror, and the longer I followed you, the more worried your eyes seemed. You turned right at the next light, and so did I. You turned right at the light after that, and so did I. But I wasn't "following" you, we just happened to be heading in the same direction, and we just happened to both be going to the grocery store.

I didn't tailgate you and I didn't honk or make threatening gestures, I was just riding to get where I was going, and when I pulled into the parking lot you slammed on your brakes, opened your window and screamed STOP FOLLOWING ME OR I'M CALLING THE POLICE!

Until that point I felt kind of bad, but now not so much, because now I feel judged. Yeah you were crying and that's a shame, but it's only because you decided that because I was on a bike, I must be up to no good. I slowed long enough to shout back I'M NOT FOLLOWING YOU, I NEED SOME DAMNED BREAD but I'm not sure you heard me. You were too busy scrambling to put your window up, as if I might reach through and yank you from behind the wheel.

Lady, I'm a biker, not a criminal. I wasn't even dressed like a "biker" I was wearing a bright yellow jacket for Pete's sake.

I'm sorry for whatever makes you think people on bikes are out to get you, but you have to get over it. And the next time you slam on your brakes with a bike behind you might be the time you kill someone. If I hadn't been expecting it, I would have ridden right up yout tailpipe into the next life, and that idea really pisses me off.

Irritatingly,
Lady On The Blue Bike