Dear...
Your Unsent Letters...Sent
Friday, September 14, 2007
Everyone
The template went wonky, and I have no idea why...I'll try to fix it, and if I can't, I'll cough up a new one...
Thumpa
Thumpa
Friday, September 7, 2007
Daughter-in-law
You have been married to my son for 18 years, and in all that time he has never said one word of criticism of you to me, until now.
Why don't you cook for my son and your two children? Why do you provide junk food or insist on expensive restaurant meals? You complained to me years ago about your mother; whom you said never cooked for you when you lived at home - and now you are doing the very same thing.
Why do you insist on moving every 2-3 years into a larger, more expensive home that you and he cannot afford easily? Why do you spend way too much money buying things for you and your kids that are not necessary, such as photos from Glamour Shots? They are inappropriate for your young children anyway. Why do you coax him into buying expensive animals. You don't need two pedigreed dogs and an expensive bird.
Why do you have the idea that it is offensive to receive criticism, even if it is the constructive kind? You won't allow him to say anything negative to your children about their behavior, and now they are becoming just like you: they cry and get depressed if anyone points out a failing to them.
How do you stay so heavy, since you don't cook? Don't you have any pride in your appearance? When you and he married, you were cute and trim. Now you are approaching obesity.
I have always liked you, as you are extremely intelligent about most things. But I fear for my son, who is skeletally thin and obviously unhappy in his marriage. I hope you will soon see what damage you have wrought, and come to your senses.
Why don't you cook for my son and your two children? Why do you provide junk food or insist on expensive restaurant meals? You complained to me years ago about your mother; whom you said never cooked for you when you lived at home - and now you are doing the very same thing.
Why do you insist on moving every 2-3 years into a larger, more expensive home that you and he cannot afford easily? Why do you spend way too much money buying things for you and your kids that are not necessary, such as photos from Glamour Shots? They are inappropriate for your young children anyway. Why do you coax him into buying expensive animals. You don't need two pedigreed dogs and an expensive bird.
Why do you have the idea that it is offensive to receive criticism, even if it is the constructive kind? You won't allow him to say anything negative to your children about their behavior, and now they are becoming just like you: they cry and get depressed if anyone points out a failing to them.
How do you stay so heavy, since you don't cook? Don't you have any pride in your appearance? When you and he married, you were cute and trim. Now you are approaching obesity.
I have always liked you, as you are extremely intelligent about most things. But I fear for my son, who is skeletally thin and obviously unhappy in his marriage. I hope you will soon see what damage you have wrought, and come to your senses.
Old man in the building behind me
Thank you so much for poisoning my dogs for a summer. I really appreciated all those hours I spent getting to know the people at my vet clinic. Without you I would not be on a first name basis with the ladies at the counter. That being said, what a surprise that you have refrained from poisoning them since we have fired off a letter to the city saying that we are going to get the police involved and are thinking of putting a camera in our back yard. I understand that dogs barking may bother you, mine bark when they are playing with supervision in the yard, very periodically. They are not left out all day, nor do they bark all night like your friend the night watchman's dog that you do not complain about. Nor do the neighbors who have loud parties at all hours of the day and smoke marijuana with their children present seem to bother you. If you are going to complain about the infrequent noise my dogs make, get off your ass and complain about all the other loud noise in our neighborhood that occurs. Oh and stop saying hi to me I do not want to talk to you ever...
Sincerely, playing in the yard with my dogs
Sincerely, playing in the yard with my dogs
Hey You On The Bicycle
Yeah, riding that bike at 9:30 at night wearing dark bike clothes no headlight and nothing reflective whatsoever is stupid. Riding that way against traffic on a dark highway with a speed limit of 55 miles per hour is positively suicidal. The next time you decide to play fast and loose with your life and safety do me a favor and don't involve ME and my car. I should not have to pay for your adventures with my peace of mind.
Tired of bicyclists who pay NO road taxes thinking they own ALL the lanes of the road.
Tired of bicyclists who pay NO road taxes thinking they own ALL the lanes of the road.
